Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists principally in dealing with men.

Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists principally in dealing with men.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as read more

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.

Ne'er take a wife till thou hast a house (and a fire) to put her in.

Ne'er take a wife till thou hast a house (and a fire) to put her in.

They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning.

They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning.

Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up.

Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up.

I think every woman is entitled to a middle husband she can forget.

I think every woman is entitled to a middle husband she can forget.

Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way.

Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way.