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Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night
Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night
Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.
Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.
He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.
He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.
Humour has justly been regarded as the finest perfection of poetic genius.
Humour has justly been regarded as the finest perfection of poetic genius.
The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.
The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.
Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live read more
Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever.
Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to read more
Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the person's house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of its head with a note that says 'You.' After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.
Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of read more
Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of the public Lana.
A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.
A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.
