A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom.

A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom.

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law.

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law.

I don't think I'll live long enough to shoot my age. I'm lucky to shoot my weight.

I don't think I'll live long enough to shoot my age. I'm lucky to shoot my weight.

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.

Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose.

Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose.

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.

I've spent most of my life golfing - the rest I've just wasted

I've spent most of my life golfing - the rest I've just wasted

We learn so many things from golf- how to suffer, for instance.

We learn so many things from golf- how to suffer, for instance.

Golf is good for the soul. You get so mad at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.

Golf is good for the soul. You get so mad at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.