Golf is deceptively simple and endlessly complicated.

Golf is deceptively simple and endlessly complicated.

I don't think I'll live long enough to shoot my age. I'm lucky to shoot my weight.

I don't think I'll live long enough to shoot my age. I'm lucky to shoot my weight.

I've spent most of my life golfing - the rest I've just wasted

I've spent most of my life golfing - the rest I've just wasted

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law.

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law.

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.

A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom.

A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom.

Golf is good for the soul. You get so mad at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.

Golf is good for the soul. You get so mad at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.