The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law.

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law.

I've spent most of my life golfing - the rest I've just wasted

I've spent most of my life golfing - the rest I've just wasted

I don't think I'll live long enough to shoot my age. I'm lucky to shoot my weight.

I don't think I'll live long enough to shoot my age. I'm lucky to shoot my weight.

Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose.

Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose.

Go play golf. Go to the golf course. Hit the ball. Find the ball. Repeat until the ball is in read more

Go play golf. Go to the golf course. Hit the ball. Find the ball. Repeat until the ball is in the hole. Have fun. The end.

Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come read more

Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing.

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.

The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing.

The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing.

I don't exaggerate - I just remember big

I don't exaggerate - I just remember big