Someone once asked me why women don't gamble as much as men do and I gave the commonsensical reply that read more

Someone once asked me why women don't gamble as much as men do and I gave the commonsensical reply that we don't have as much money. That was a true but incomplete answer. In fact, women's total instinct for gambling is satisfied by marriage.

If ever two were one, then surely we. If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.

If ever two were one, then surely we. If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.

Good women always think it is their fault when someone else is being offensive. Bad women never take the blame read more

Good women always think it is their fault when someone else is being offensive. Bad women never take the blame for anything.

Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.

Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.

Man is not the enemy here, but the fellow victim.

Man is not the enemy here, but the fellow victim.

The best way to hold a man is in your arms.

The best way to hold a man is in your arms.

The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind read more

The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman.

The most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is that one of them must be read more

The most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is that one of them must be good at taking orders.

A single man has not nearly the value he would have in a state of union. He is an incomplete read more

A single man has not nearly the value he would have in a state of union. He is an incomplete animal. He resembles the odd half of a pair of scissors.