When a man opens the car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.

When a man opens the car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.

Govern a family as you would cook a small fish - very gently.

Govern a family as you would cook a small fish - very gently.

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like read more

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

Call no man your father upon the earth, for one is your Father, which is in heaven.

Call no man your father upon the earth, for one is your Father, which is in heaven.

I've had the boyhood thing of being Elvis. Now I want to be with my best friend, and my best read more

I've had the boyhood thing of being Elvis. Now I want to be with my best friend, and my best friend's my wife. Who could ask for anything more?

A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What do you mean?" read more

A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What do you mean?" responded her mother. "Well, she went down the aisle with one man, and came back with another.".

A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her read more

A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again.

Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends up blocking his retreat.

Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends up blocking his retreat.