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A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold read more
A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone. 'Hear that?' you say, 'That's dynamite, baby.'
A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your steps as you walk the tightrope of read more
A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your steps as you walk the tightrope of life.
Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.
Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.
A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.
A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.
The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another read more
The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another chance.
Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.
Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.
A difference of taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections.
A difference of taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections.
I bet when the neanderthal kids would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick, read more
I bet when the neanderthal kids would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick, heavy brows." Then they would all get embarrassed because they remembered they had the big hunky brows too, and they'd get mad and eat the snowman.
Optimism: The doctrine, or belief, that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly, everything good, especially the bad, and everything read more
Optimism: The doctrine, or belief, that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly, everything good, especially the bad, and everything right that is wrong.
