The capon burns, the pig falls from the spit,
The clock hath strucken twelve upon the bell;
My mistress made it one upon my cheek:
She is so hot because the meat is cold;
The meat is cold because you come not home;
You come not home because you have no stomach;
You have no stomach, having broke your fast;
But we, that know what 'tis to fast and pray,
Are penitent for your default to-day.
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Of herbs, and other country messes,
Which the neat-handed Phillis dresses.
Of herbs, and other country messes,
Which the neat-handed Phillis dresses.
The vulgar boil, the learned roast, an egg.
The vulgar boil, the learned roast, an egg.
Hallo! A great deal of steam! the pudding was out of the
copper. A smell like a washing-day! That read more
Hallo! A great deal of steam! the pudding was out of the
copper. A smell like a washing-day! That was the cloth. A
smell like an eating-house and a pastrycook's next door to each
other, with a laundress's next door to that. That was the
pudding.
I never strove to rule the roast,
She ne'er refus'd to pledge my toast.
I never strove to rule the roast,
She ne'er refus'd to pledge my toast.
"Very well," cried I, "that's a good girl; I find you are
perfectly qualified for making converts, and so read more
"Very well," cried I, "that's a good girl; I find you are
perfectly qualified for making converts, and so go help your
mother to make the gooseberry bye."
Yet smelt roast meat, beheld a huge fire shine,
And cooks in motion with their clean arms bared.
Yet smelt roast meat, beheld a huge fire shine,
And cooks in motion with their clean arms bared.
Cookery is become an art, a noble science; cooks are gentlemen.
Cookery is become an art, a noble science; cooks are gentlemen.
Every investigation which is guided by principles of nature fixes
its ultimate aim entirely on gratifying the stomach.
Every investigation which is guided by principles of nature fixes
its ultimate aim entirely on gratifying the stomach.
And nearer as they came, a genial savour
Of certain stews, and roast-meats, and pilaus.
Things which read more
And nearer as they came, a genial savour
Of certain stews, and roast-meats, and pilaus.
Things which in hungry mortals' eyes find favour.
