The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober.

The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober.

You can't drown yourself in drink. I've tried, you float.

You can't drown yourself in drink. I've tried, you float.

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're read more

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

How gracious those dews of solace that over my senses fall
At the clink of the ice in the read more

How gracious those dews of solace that over my senses fall
At the clink of the ice in the pitcher the boy brings up the
hall.

And I wish his soul in heaven may dwell,
Who first invented this leathern bottel!

And I wish his soul in heaven may dwell,
Who first invented this leathern bottel!

Inspiring bold John Barleycorn,
What dangers thou canst make us scorn!
Wi' tippenny, we fear nae evil;
read more

Inspiring bold John Barleycorn,
What dangers thou canst make us scorn!
Wi' tippenny, we fear nae evil;
Wi' usquebae, we'll face the devil!

Mynheer Vandunck, though he never was drunk,
Sipped brandy and water gayly.

Mynheer Vandunck, though he never was drunk,
Sipped brandy and water gayly.

Nothing in Nature's sober found,
But an eternal Health goes round.
Fill up the Bowl then, fill read more

Nothing in Nature's sober found,
But an eternal Health goes round.
Fill up the Bowl then, fill it high--
Fill all the Glasses there; for why
Should every Creature Drink but I?
Why, Man of Morals, tell me why?

Did you ever hear of Captain Wattle?
He was all for love and a little for the bottle.

Did you ever hear of Captain Wattle?
He was all for love and a little for the bottle.