Wedding is destiny, and hanging likewise.

Wedding is destiny, and hanging likewise.

Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is the temple where read more

Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is the temple where they worship arrested development.

Instead of getting hard ourselves and trying to compete, women should try to give their best qualities to men -- read more

Instead of getting hard ourselves and trying to compete, women should try to give their best qualities to men -- bring them softness, teach them how to cry. -Joan Baez.

Though bachelors be the strongest stakes, married men are the best binders, in the hedge of the commonwealth.

Though bachelors be the strongest stakes, married men are the best binders, in the hedge of the commonwealth.

Girls are like butterflies...pretty to look at, too hard to catch.

Girls are like butterflies...pretty to look at, too hard to catch.

I hate women because they always know where things are.

I hate women because they always know where things are.

Someone once asked me why women don't gamble as much as men do and I gave the commonsensical reply that read more

Someone once asked me why women don't gamble as much as men do and I gave the commonsensical reply that we don't have as much money. That was a true but incomplete answer. In fact, women's total instinct for gambling is satisfied by marriage.

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

We have not passed that subtle line between childhood and adulthood until we move from the passive voice to the read more

We have not passed that subtle line between childhood and adulthood until we move from the passive voice to the active voice -- that is, until we have stopped saying "It got lost," and say, "I lost it.".