I think every woman is entitled to a middle husband she can forget.

I think every woman is entitled to a middle husband she can forget.

She is not made to be the admiration of all, but the happiness of one.

She is not made to be the admiration of all, but the happiness of one.

If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.

If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.

I refuse to admit that I am more than 52, even if that makes my children illegitimate.

I refuse to admit that I am more than 52, even if that makes my children illegitimate.

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.

Instead of getting hard ourselves and trying to compete, women should try to give their best qualities to men -- read more

Instead of getting hard ourselves and trying to compete, women should try to give their best qualities to men -- bring them softness, teach them how to cry. -Joan Baez.

When a man gets up to speak, people listen, then look. When a woman gets up, people look; then, if read more

When a man gets up to speak, people listen, then look. When a woman gets up, people look; then, if they like what they see, they listen.

A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your read more

A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.

I've sometimes thought of marrying, and then I've thought again.

I've sometimes thought of marrying, and then I've thought again.