He followed in his father's footsteps, but his gait was somewhat erratic.

He followed in his father's footsteps, but his gait was somewhat erratic.

There must be some reason why a man must be convinced, while a woman must be persuaded.

There must be some reason why a man must be convinced, while a woman must be persuaded.

If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.

If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.

There are three things men can do with women: love them, suffer for them, or turn them into literature.

There are three things men can do with women: love them, suffer for them, or turn them into literature.

All women are misfits. We do not fit into this world without amputations. -Marge Piercy.

All women are misfits. We do not fit into this world without amputations. -Marge Piercy.

What a dreadful thing it must be to have a dull father.

What a dreadful thing it must be to have a dull father.

Every woman is wrong until she cries, and then she is right, instantly

Every woman is wrong until she cries, and then she is right, instantly

Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose.

Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose.

Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. read more

Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around her neck 'Lay on Top of Me Or I'll Die.' I didn't know what I was gonna do....".