The shortest distance between two jokes makes a perfect speech.

The shortest distance between two jokes makes a perfect speech.

If you've heard this story before, don't stop me, because I'd like to hear it again.

If you've heard this story before, don't stop me, because I'd like to hear it again.

You throw a perfectly straight line at the audience and then, right at the end, you curve it. Good jokes read more

You throw a perfectly straight line at the audience and then, right at the end, you curve it. Good jokes do that.

"He started hating me, cause I couldn't laugh at his jokes. I just started finding it impossible to laugh at read more

"He started hating me, cause I couldn't laugh at his jokes. I just started finding it impossible to laugh at his jokes the way I used to."

Whatever is funny is subversive, every joke is ultimately a custard pie... a dirty joke is a sort of mental read more

Whatever is funny is subversive, every joke is ultimately a custard pie... a dirty joke is a sort of mental rebellion.

A difference of tastes in jokes is a great strain on the affections.

A difference of tastes in jokes is a great strain on the affections.

The crisis of today is the joke of tomorrow.

The crisis of today is the joke of tomorrow.

I'm not offended by dumb blonde jokes because I know that I'm not dumb. I also know I'm not blonde.

I'm not offended by dumb blonde jokes because I know that I'm not dumb. I also know I'm not blonde.

The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle read more

The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree.