Mark Twain

In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and read more

In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.

Religion consists of a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain

Religion consists of a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain

Advertisements contain the only truths to be relied on in a newspaper.

Advertisements contain the only truths to be relied on in a newspaper.

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.

I have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.

I have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.