Mark Twain

There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.

There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.

God, grant me the Senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the read more

God, grant me the Senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference

When a man's dog turns against him it is time for a wife to pack her trunk and go home read more

When a man's dog turns against him it is time for a wife to pack her trunk and go home to mama.

To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good is nobler--and less trouble.

To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good is nobler--and less trouble.

Let me make the superstitions of a nation and I care not who makes its laws or its songs either.

Let me make the superstitions of a nation and I care not who makes its laws or its songs either.