Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and read more

Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with

I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.

I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.

A woman's always younger than a man of equal years.

A woman's always younger than a man of equal years.

Do you know why the Lord withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may love you instead read more

Do you know why the Lord withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may love you instead of laugh at you.

Remarriage: A triumph of hope over experience.

Remarriage: A triumph of hope over experience.

Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is read more

Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.

Women are like fine wine. They all start out fresh, fruity and intoxicating to the mind and then they turn read more

Women are like fine wine. They all start out fresh, fruity and intoxicating to the mind and then they turn full-bodied with age until they go sour and vinegary and give you a headache.

Men naturally despise those who court them, but respect those who do not give way to them.

Men naturally despise those who court them, but respect those who do not give way to them.

Men represent the triumph of mind over morals, whereas women represent the triumph of matter over mind.

Men represent the triumph of mind over morals, whereas women represent the triumph of matter over mind.