Any girl can be glamorous; all you have to do is stand still and look stupid.

Any girl can be glamorous; all you have to do is stand still and look stupid.

Do you know why the Lord withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may love you instead read more

Do you know why the Lord withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may love you instead of laugh at you.

Men naturally despise those who court them, but respect those who do not give way to them.

Men naturally despise those who court them, but respect those who do not give way to them.

I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.

I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.

When women hold off from marrying men, we call it independence. When men hold off from marrying women, we call read more

When women hold off from marrying men, we call it independence. When men hold off from marrying women, we call it fear of commitment.

Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is read more

Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.

A woman's always younger than a man of equal years.

A woman's always younger than a man of equal years.

Women and cats do as they damned well please, and men and dogs had best learn to live with it.

Women and cats do as they damned well please, and men and dogs had best learn to live with it.

When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can beat him at.

When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can beat him at.