Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by committee meetings.

Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by committee meetings.

Don't forget to swing hard, in case you hit the ball.

Don't forget to swing hard, in case you hit the ball.

I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid.

I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid.

Football is violence and cold weather and sex and college rye.

Football is violence and cold weather and sex and college rye.

He's looking for some meaningful penetration into the backline.

He's looking for some meaningful penetration into the backline.

We train by a parkway, which runs beside a river. If we had a lonely end, he either would be read more

We train by a parkway, which runs beside a river. If we had a lonely end, he either would be hit by a car or drown.
(on why he doesn't use a lonely end)

Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject.
(recounting what he told a player read more

Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject.
(recounting what he told a player who received four F's and one D)

Football is an incredible game. Sometimes it's so incredible, it's unbelievable.

Football is an incredible game. Sometimes it's so incredible, it's unbelievable.

The only one who can beat me is me.

The only one who can beat me is me.