I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flagstick on top.

The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flagstick on top.

Slumps are like a soft bed. They're easy to get into and hard to get out of.

Slumps are like a soft bed. They're easy to get into and hard to get out of.

My sister's expecting a baby and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt.

My sister's expecting a baby and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt.

Hail Caesar, those who are about to die salute you.

Hail Caesar, those who are about to die salute you.

Baseball has the great advantage over cricket of being sooner ended.

Baseball has the great advantage over cricket of being sooner ended.

They shouldn't throw at me. I'm the father of five or six kids.

They shouldn't throw at me. I'm the father of five or six kids.

Some people are born on third base and go through life thinking they hit a triple.

Some people are born on third base and go through life thinking they hit a triple.

The first time I ever saw Arnold Palmer, I said, "There's a star." The first time I saw Jack Nicklaus, read more

The first time I ever saw Arnold Palmer, I said, "There's a star." The first time I saw Jack Nicklaus, I said, "Superstar." I feel the same way about Tiger Woods.