If God wanted women to understand men, football would never have been created.

If God wanted women to understand men, football would never have been created.

But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet.
(telling Gator fans that a fire at Auburn's read more

But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet.
(telling Gator fans that a fire at Auburn's football dorm had destroyed 20 books)

Baseball is like church. Many attend but few understand.

Baseball is like church. Many attend but few understand.

I don't want to play golf. When I hit a ball, I want someone else to go chase it.

I don't want to play golf. When I hit a ball, I want someone else to go chase it.

Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject.
(recounting what he told a player read more

Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject.
(recounting what he told a player who received four F's and one D)

It's a round ball and a round bat, and you got to hit it square.

It's a round ball and a round bat, and you got to hit it square.

We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.

We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.

The racecourse is as level as a billiard ball

The racecourse is as level as a billiard ball

Adversity causes some men to break; others to break records.

Adversity causes some men to break; others to break records.