With those who don't give a damn about baseball, I can only sympathize. I do not resent them. I am read more

With those who don't give a damn about baseball, I can only sympathize. I do not resent them. I am even willing to concede that many of them are physically clean, good to their mothers and in favor of world peace. But while the game is on, I can't think of anything to say to them.

Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw.

Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw.

Everybody knows that I have been pumping Martin Leslie for a couple of seasons now.

Everybody knows that I have been pumping Martin Leslie for a couple of seasons now.

It wasn't as easy as you think. It's hard to stay awake that long.
(after his team had defeated read more

It wasn't as easy as you think. It's hard to stay awake that long.
(after his team had defeated Whitman 70-30)

If God wanted women to understand men, football would never have been created.

If God wanted women to understand men, football would never have been created.

As I remember it, the bases were loaded.
(asked his reaction to hitting a grand slam)

As I remember it, the bases were loaded.
(asked his reaction to hitting a grand slam)

What is both surprising and delightful is that spectators are allowed, and even expected, to join in the vocal part read more

What is both surprising and delightful is that spectators are allowed, and even expected, to join in the vocal part of the game... There is no reason why the field should not try to put the batsman off his stroke at the critical moment by neatly timed disparagements of his wife's fidelity and his mother's respectability.

This is really a lovely horse, I once rode her mother.

This is really a lovely horse, I once rode her mother.

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to read more

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death.