I'm going to send the injured reserve players out for the toss next time.
(after the team's cocaptain, offensive read more

I'm going to send the injured reserve players out for the toss next time.
(after the team's cocaptain, offensive guard Robert Pratt, pulled a hamstring running onto the field for the coin toss against St. Louis)

I'm not allowed to comment on lousy officiating.

I'm not allowed to comment on lousy officiating.

It's a nice bonus but, you know, I have to pay taxes too.
(after winning the Grand Slam Cup.)

It's a nice bonus but, you know, I have to pay taxes too.
(after winning the Grand Slam Cup.)

Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.

Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.

I don't know why people question the academic training of an athlete. Fifty percent of the doctors in this country read more

I don't know why people question the academic training of an athlete. Fifty percent of the doctors in this country graduated in the bottom half of their classes.

Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew.

Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew.

I run because it's my passion, and not just a sport. Every time I walk out the door, I know read more

I run because it's my passion, and not just a sport. Every time I walk out the door, I know why I'm going where I'm going and I'm already focused on that special place where I find my peace and solitude. Running, to me, is more than just a physical exercise... it's a consistent reward for victory!

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white read more

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.

The more I train the more I realize I have more speed in me.

The more I train the more I realize I have more speed in me.