Baseball is a game where a curve is an optical illusion, a screwball can be a pitch or a person, read more

Baseball is a game where a curve is an optical illusion, a screwball can be a pitch or a person, stealing is legal and you can spit anywhere you like except in the umpire's eye or on the ball.

I see no reason why Tiger Woods won't become a great player. Man, can he smoke some shots. A little read more

I see no reason why Tiger Woods won't become a great player. Man, can he smoke some shots. A little refinement on Tiger's short game and there'll be nothing. He's already pretty darn imposing.

We train by a parkway, which runs beside a river. If we had a lonely end, he either would be read more

We train by a parkway, which runs beside a river. If we had a lonely end, he either would be hit by a car or drown.
(on why he doesn't use a lonely end)

What is both surprising and delightful is that spectators are allowed, and even expected, to join in the vocal part read more

What is both surprising and delightful is that spectators are allowed, and even expected, to join in the vocal part of the game... There is no reason why the field should not try to put the batsman off his stroke at the critical moment by neatly timed disparagements of his wife's fidelity and his mother's respectability.

That's why I don't talk. Because I talk too much.

That's why I don't talk. Because I talk too much.

Football is violence and cold weather and sex and college rye.

Football is violence and cold weather and sex and college rye.

Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl.

Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl.

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to read more

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death.

I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators.

I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators.