When I look at the future, it's so bright it burns my eyes.

When I look at the future, it's so bright it burns my eyes.

Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. read more

Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause — you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.

Luck is a matter of preparation meeting opportunity.

Luck is a matter of preparation meeting opportunity.

I'm married to the theater but my mistress is the films.

I'm married to the theater but my mistress is the films.

So, where's the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?

So, where's the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?

Fortunately I know how to counter it, the man who did the waking buys the man who was sleeping a read more

Fortunately I know how to counter it, the man who did the waking buys the man who was sleeping a drink. The man who was sleeping drinks it while listening to a proposition, from the man who did the waking.

I am the modern, intelligent, independent-type woman. In other words, a girl who can not get a man.

I am the modern, intelligent, independent-type woman. In other words, a girl who can not get a man.

If two men on the same job agree all the time, then one is useless. If they disagree all the read more

If two men on the same job agree all the time, then one is useless. If they disagree all the time, then both are useless.

Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, read more

Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.