I'm married to the theater but my mistress is the films.

I'm married to the theater but my mistress is the films.

You can have it all. You just can't have it all at once.

You can have it all. You just can't have it all at once.

The embarrassing thing is that the salad dressing is outgrossing my films.

The embarrassing thing is that the salad dressing is outgrossing my films.

Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. 'Get out' and 'I never want to see read more

Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. 'Get out' and 'I never want to see you again' might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, 'I love you.... I want to marry you.... I want to have your children.' Sometimes they leave skid marks.

I am the modern, intelligent, independent-type woman. In other words, a girl who can not get a man.

I am the modern, intelligent, independent-type woman. In other words, a girl who can not get a man.

A film is a petrified fountain of thought.

A film is a petrified fountain of thought.

That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.

That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take read more

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.

Now I know I've got a heart, because it's breaking.

Now I know I've got a heart, because it's breaking.