We [Americans] are the lavishest and showiest and most luxury-loving people on the earth; and at our masthead we fly read more

We [Americans] are the lavishest and showiest and most luxury-loving people on the earth; and at our masthead we fly one true and honest symbol, the gaudiest flag the world has ever seen.

The cost of freedom is always high, but Americans have always paid it. And one path we shall never choose, read more

The cost of freedom is always high, but Americans have always paid it. And one path we shall never choose, and that is the path of surrender, or submission.

When good Americans die they go to Paris.

When good Americans die they go to Paris.

You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after they've tried everything else.

You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after they've tried everything else.

Americans have different ways of saying things. They say "elevator", we say "lift"... they say "President", we say "stupid psychopathic read more

Americans have different ways of saying things. They say "elevator", we say "lift"... they say "President", we say "stupid psychopathic git.

American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat read more

American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat in it.

We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless you count read more

We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless you count maybe 25 or 30 little scuzzball countries like Scotland that we could vaporize in seconds if we felt like it

America is the most grandiose experiment the world has seen, but, I am afraid, it is not going to be read more

America is the most grandiose experiment the world has seen, but, I am afraid, it is not going to be a success.

To those of you who received honours, awards and distinctions, I say well done. And to the C students, I read more

To those of you who received honours, awards and distinctions, I say well done. And to the C students, I say you, too, can be president of the United States.