When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's a reason.

When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's a reason.

"Chumps always make the best husbands. When you marry, Sally, grab a chump. Tap his forehead first, and if it read more

"Chumps always make the best husbands. When you marry, Sally, grab a chump. Tap his forehead first, and if it rings solid, don't hesitate."

I used to tell my husband that, if he could make me 'understand' something, it would be clear to all read more

I used to tell my husband that, if he could make me 'understand' something, it would be clear to all the other people in the country.

No, I don't understand my husband's theory of relativity, but I know my husband, and I know he can be read more

No, I don't understand my husband's theory of relativity, but I know my husband, and I know he can be trusted.

You can have all the intelligence in the world and don't have enough stamina. I have seen some very bright, read more

You can have all the intelligence in the world and don't have enough stamina. I have seen some very bright, bright women who do not have the stamina for husbands.

It's a wise husband who will buy his wife such fine china that she won't trust him to wash the read more

It's a wise husband who will buy his wife such fine china that she won't trust him to wash the dishes

The husbands of very beautiful women belong to the criminal classes.

The husbands of very beautiful women belong to the criminal classes.

Sometimes I think [my husband] is so amazing that I don't know why he's with me. I don't know whether read more

Sometimes I think [my husband] is so amazing that I don't know why he's with me. I don't know whether I'm good enough. But if I make him happy, then I'm everything I want to be.

Husbands are like fires - they go out when they're left unattended.

Husbands are like fires - they go out when they're left unattended.