Many people think that history is a dull subject. Dull? Is it 'dull' that Jesse James once got bitten on read more

Many people think that history is a dull subject. Dull? Is it 'dull' that Jesse James once got bitten on the forehead by an ant, and at first it didn't seem like anything, but then the bite got worse and worse, so he went to a doctor in town, and the secretary told him to wait, so he sat down and waited, and waited, and waited, and waited, and then finally he got to see the doctor, and the doctor put some salve on it? You call that dull?

The best people renounce all for one goal, the eternal fame of mortals; but most people stuff themselves like cattle.

The best people renounce all for one goal, the eternal fame of mortals; but most people stuff themselves like cattle.

I love to go to the schoolyard and watch the children jump and scream, but they don't know I'm using read more

I love to go to the schoolyard and watch the children jump and scream, but they don't know I'm using blanks.

People are very open-minded about new things - as long as they're exactly like the old ones.

People are very open-minded about new things - as long as they're exactly like the old ones.

I stand here before you not as a prophet, but as a humble servant of you, the people.

I stand here before you not as a prophet, but as a humble servant of you, the people.

Humor is richly rewarding to the person who employs it. It has some value in gaining and holding attention, but read more

Humor is richly rewarding to the person who employs it. It has some value in gaining and holding attention, but it has no persuasive value at all.

People don't do things for you or against you, they do things for themselves - it's fortune, good or bad, read more

People don't do things for you or against you, they do things for themselves - it's fortune, good or bad, to be in the way

I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?'

I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?'

Instead of studying for finals, what about just going to the Bahamas and catching some rays? Maybe you'll flunk, but read more

Instead of studying for finals, what about just going to the Bahamas and catching some rays? Maybe you'll flunk, but you might have flunked anyway; that's my point.