I could live a week on one good compliment.

I could live a week on one good compliment.

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

A behaviorist is someone who pulls habits out of rats.

A behaviorist is someone who pulls habits out of rats.

Everyone is kneaded out of the same dough but not baked in the same oven.

Everyone is kneaded out of the same dough but not baked in the same oven.

Love is blind, but friendship is clairvoyant.

Love is blind, but friendship is clairvoyant.

If you aren't room temperature, your situation can always be improved.

If you aren't room temperature, your situation can always be improved.

Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking.

Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking.

Time is a circus--always packing up and moving away.

Time is a circus--always packing up and moving away.

A guy ran a red light like at 2AM, got home fine, no police saw him or anything like that. read more

A guy ran a red light like at 2AM, got home fine, no police saw him or anything like that. About 3 weeks later he gets a bill from the police department and a photo of his truck running that light. So, like the smart/dumbass he is, he gets cute, lays out some money on the bed(the price of the ticket), takes a photo of it, and sends it in. So a few weeks pass and he gets another letter, this one has a photo of handcuffs.
He promptly paid the bill.