Rodney Dangerfield

If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is ugliness

If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is ugliness

I was such an ugly kid - When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up

I was such an ugly kid - When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up

I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it.

I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it.

I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.

I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.

My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May read more

My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.