Mark Twain

Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.

Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.

He gossips habitually; he lacks the common wisdom to keep still that deadly enemy of man, his own tongue

He gossips habitually; he lacks the common wisdom to keep still that deadly enemy of man, his own tongue

I'm glad I did it, partly because it was worth it, but mostly because I shall never have to do read more

I'm glad I did it, partly because it was worth it, but mostly because I shall never have to do it again

Etiquette tip: More people will get out of your way if you say "I'm gonna puke!" than if you say read more

Etiquette tip: More people will get out of your way if you say "I'm gonna puke!" than if you say "Excuse me".

Satan hasn't a single salaried helper; the Opposition employ a million.

Satan hasn't a single salaried helper; the Opposition employ a million.