Mark Twain

All that I care to know is that a man is a human being--that is enough for me; he can't read more

All that I care to know is that a man is a human being--that is enough for me; he can't be any worse.

Etiquette tip: More people will get out of your way if you say "I'm gonna puke!" than if you say read more

Etiquette tip: More people will get out of your way if you say "I'm gonna puke!" than if you say "Excuse me".

Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are read more

Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand.

Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to.

Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to.

My kind of loyalty was loyalty to one's country, not to its institutions or its officeholders. The country is the read more

My kind of loyalty was loyalty to one's country, not to its institutions or its officeholders. The country is the real thing, the substantial thing, the eternal thing; it is the thing to watch over, and care for, and be loyal to institutions are extraneous, they are its mere clothing, and clothing can wear out, become ragged, cease to be comfortable, cease to protect the body from winter, disease, and death.