George Carlin

The more syllables a euphemism has, the further divorced from reality it is

The more syllables a euphemism has, the further divorced from reality it is

When I was a kid, if a guy got killed in a western movie I always wondered who got his read more

When I was a kid, if a guy got killed in a western movie I always wondered who got his horse

When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.

When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces read more

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.

There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.

There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.