George Carlin

The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.

The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces read more

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can read more

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down.

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that read more

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?