George Carlin

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces read more

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.

When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.

Just think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize half of them are even stupider!

Just think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize half of them are even stupider!

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that read more

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?