Marriage is a wonderful invention; but, then again, so is a
bicycle repair kit.

Marriage is a wonderful invention; but, then again, so is a
bicycle repair kit.

Men marry to make an end; women to make a beginning.

Men marry to make an end; women to make a beginning.

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest read more

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

It destroys one's nerves to be amiable every day to the same human being.

It destroys one's nerves to be amiable every day to the same human being.

All marriages are happy. It's the living together afterward that causes all the trouble.

All marriages are happy. It's the living together afterward that causes all the trouble.

Marriage is a mistake every man should make.

Marriage is a mistake every man should make.

Why get married and make one man miserable when I can stay single and make thousands miserable?

Why get married and make one man miserable when I can stay single and make thousands miserable?

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation
with the maximum of opportunity.

Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation
with the maximum of opportunity.