In every mess I find a friend,
In every port a wife.

In every mess I find a friend,
In every port a wife.

I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.

I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.

Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough

Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough

She would rather be an old man's darling than a young man's
warling.

She would rather be an old man's darling than a young man's
warling.

What is there in the vale of life
Half so delightful as a wife,
When friendship, love, read more

What is there in the vale of life
Half so delightful as a wife,
When friendship, love, and peace combine
To stamp the marriage-bond divine?

The wife was pretty, trifling, childish, weak;
She could not think, but would not cease to speak.

The wife was pretty, trifling, childish, weak;
She could not think, but would not cease to speak.

So bent on self-sanctifying,--
That she never thought of trying
To save her poor husband as well.

So bent on self-sanctifying,--
That she never thought of trying
To save her poor husband as well.

A good wife makes a good husband

A good wife makes a good husband

My fond affection thou hast seen,
Then judge of my regret
To think more happy thou hadst read more

My fond affection thou hast seen,
Then judge of my regret
To think more happy thou hadst been
If we had never met!
And has that thought been shared by thee?
Ah, no! that smiling cheek
Proves more unchanging love for me
Than labor'd words could speak.