Art may imitate life, but life imitates TV.

Art may imitate life, but life imitates TV.

Television? The word is half Latin and half Greek. No good can come of it.

Television? The word is half Latin and half Greek. No good can come of it.

Time has convinced me of one thing: Television is for appearing on--not for looking at.

Time has convinced me of one thing: Television is for appearing on--not for looking at.

By the age of six the average child will have completed the basic American education.... From television, the child will read more

By the age of six the average child will have completed the basic American education.... From television, the child will have learned how to pick a lock, commit a fairly elaborate bank holdup, prevent wetness all day long, get the laundry twice as white, and kill people with a variety of sophisticated armaments.

Did you ever think about life as a metaphor for television?

Did you ever think about life as a metaphor for television?

Television is chewing gum for the eyes.

Television is chewing gum for the eyes.

Television -- a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well-done.

Television -- a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well-done.

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read read more

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.

Television: A medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done.

Television: A medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done.