One player was lost because he broke his nose. How do you go about getting a nose in condition for read more

One player was lost because he broke his nose. How do you go about getting a nose in condition for football?
(asking if the abnormal number of Longhorn injuries this season resulted from poor physical conditioning)

Don't park in the spaces marked, "Reserved for Umpires.".

Don't park in the spaces marked, "Reserved for Umpires.".

In order to excel, you must be completely dedicated to your chosen sport. You must also be prepared to work read more

In order to excel, you must be completely dedicated to your chosen sport. You must also be prepared to work hard and be willing to accept destructive criticism. Without 100% dedication, you won't be able to do this.

I can feel the wind go by when I run. It feels good. It feels fast.

I can feel the wind go by when I run. It feels good. It feels fast.

We train by a parkway, which runs beside a river. If we had a lonely end, he either would be read more

We train by a parkway, which runs beside a river. If we had a lonely end, he either would be hit by a car or drown.
(on why he doesn't use a lonely end)

Sometimes they write what I say and not what I mean.
(on sportswriters)

Sometimes they write what I say and not what I mean.
(on sportswriters)

Back then, my idol was Bugs Bunny, because I saw a cartoon of him playing ball - you know, the read more

Back then, my idol was Bugs Bunny, because I saw a cartoon of him playing ball - you know, the one where he plays every position himself with nobody else on the field but him? Now that I think of it, Bugs is still my idol. You have to love a ballplayer like that.

If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better read more

If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is.

My sister's expecting a baby and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt.

My sister's expecting a baby and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt.