They pay me to practice. Sundays I play for free.
(explaining his contractual obligations)

They pay me to practice. Sundays I play for free.
(explaining his contractual obligations)

Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew.

Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew.

It's all to do with the training: you can do a lot if you're properly trained.

It's all to do with the training: you can do a lot if you're properly trained.

I don't psyche myself up. I psyche myself down. I think clearer when I'm not psyched up.

I don't psyche myself up. I psyche myself down. I think clearer when I'm not psyched up.

I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear read more

I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.

Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a read more

Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac.

I want all the kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I want all the kids read more

I want all the kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I want all the kids to copulate me.
(on being a role model)

Don't forget to swing hard, in case you hit the ball.

Don't forget to swing hard, in case you hit the ball.

If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.

If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.