I'm Jimmy Carter, and I'm going to be your next president.

I'm Jimmy Carter, and I'm going to be your next president.

President Bush is taking the entire month of August off. Bush said today he thinks it is important for a read more

President Bush is taking the entire month of August off. Bush said today he thinks it is important for a president to spend time away from Washington. Or at least that's what Dick Cheney told him.

All the president is, is a glorified public relations man who spends his time flattering, kissing, and kicking people to read more

All the president is, is a glorified public relations man who spends his time flattering, kissing, and kicking people to get them to do what they are supposed to do anyway.

President Bush left for Canada today to attend a trade summit. Reportedly, the trade summit got off to an awkward read more

President Bush left for Canada today to attend a trade summit. Reportedly, the trade summit got off to an awkward start when the president pulled out his baseball cards.

You really have to experience the feeling of being with the
president in the oval office. . . . read more

You really have to experience the feeling of being with the
president in the oval office. . . . It's a disease I came to call
Ovalitis.

The United States brags about its political system, but the President says one thing during the election, something else when read more

The United States brags about its political system, but the President says one thing during the election, something else when he takes office, something else at midterm and something else when he leaves.

The vice-presidency isn't worth a pitcher of warm piss.

The vice-presidency isn't worth a pitcher of warm piss.

Somewhere out in this audience may even be someone who will one day follow in my footsteps, and preside over read more

Somewhere out in this audience may even be someone who will one day follow in my footsteps, and preside over the White House as the president's spouse. I wish him well.

The presidency has made every man who occupied it, no matter how small, bigger than he was; and no matter read more

The presidency has made every man who occupied it, no matter how small, bigger than he was; and no matter how big, not big enough for its demands.