President Bush left for Canada today to attend a trade summit. Reportedly, the trade summit got off to an awkward read more

President Bush left for Canada today to attend a trade summit. Reportedly, the trade summit got off to an awkward start when the president pulled out his baseball cards.

All the president is, is a glorified public relations man who spends his time flattering, kissing, and kicking people to read more

All the president is, is a glorified public relations man who spends his time flattering, kissing, and kicking people to get them to do what they are supposed to do anyway.

I'm President of the United States, and I'm not going to eat any
more broccoli!

I'm President of the United States, and I'm not going to eat any
more broccoli!

We have a cancer within, close to the Presidency, that is
growing.

We have a cancer within, close to the Presidency, that is
growing.

Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following him. Finally, someone told him, read more

Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following him. Finally, someone told him, 'Psst. That's the Secret Service.'

I also wish that the Pledge of Allegiance were directed at the Constitution and the Bill of Rights, as it read more

I also wish that the Pledge of Allegiance were directed at the Constitution and the Bill of Rights, as it is when the President takes his oath of office, rather than to the flag and the nation

The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.

The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.

The vice-presidency isn't worth a pitcher of warm piss.

The vice-presidency isn't worth a pitcher of warm piss.

No easy problems ever come to the President of the United States.
If they are easy to solve, somebody read more

No easy problems ever come to the President of the United States.
If they are easy to solve, somebody else has solved them.