People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year. They don't realize that most of us only make read more

People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year. They don't realize that most of us only make $500,000.

My sister's expecting a baby and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt.

My sister's expecting a baby and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt.

Overall the fundamentals seem to be there and he's obviously got a very mature head on his shoulders. He's got read more

Overall the fundamentals seem to be there and he's obviously got a very mature head on his shoulders. He's got a kind of presence.

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white read more

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.

Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject.
(recounting what he told a player read more

Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject.
(recounting what he told a player who received four F's and one D)

One player was lost because he broke his nose. How do you go about getting a nose in condition for read more

One player was lost because he broke his nose. How do you go about getting a nose in condition for football?
(asking if the abnormal number of Longhorn injuries this season resulted from poor physical conditioning)

We train by a parkway, which runs beside a river. If we had a lonely end, he either would be read more

We train by a parkway, which runs beside a river. If we had a lonely end, he either would be hit by a car or drown.
(on why he doesn't use a lonely end)

I'm going to send the injured reserve players out for the toss next time.
(after the team's co-captain, offensive read more

I'm going to send the injured reserve players out for the toss next time.
(after the team's co-captain, offensive guard Robert Pratt, pulled a hamstring running onto the field for the coin toss against St. Louis)

As I remember it, the bases were loaded.
(asked his reaction to hitting a grand slam)

As I remember it, the bases were loaded.
(asked his reaction to hitting a grand slam)