Slumps are like a soft bed. They're easy to get into and hard to get out of.

Slumps are like a soft bed. They're easy to get into and hard to get out of.

The racecourse is as level as a billiard ball

The racecourse is as level as a billiard ball

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

There isn't a flaw in his golf or his makeup. He will win more majors than Arnold Palmer and me read more

There isn't a flaw in his golf or his makeup. He will win more majors than Arnold Palmer and me combined. Somebody is going to dust my records. It might as well be Tiger, because he's such a great kid.

I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.

I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.

If God wanted women to understand men, football would never have been created.

If God wanted women to understand men, football would never have been created.

He said, 'Gosh, Dad, that mean's we're not going to any more bowl games.'
(on his 11-year-old son's reaction read more

He said, 'Gosh, Dad, that mean's we're not going to any more bowl games.'
(on his 11-year-old son's reaction after he took the job with the Boilermakers)

It breaks your heart. It is designed to break your heart. The game begins in the spring when everything else read more

It breaks your heart. It is designed to break your heart. The game begins in the spring when everything else begins again, and it blossoms in the summer, filling the afternoons and evenings, and then as soon as the chill rains come, it stops and leaves you to face the fall alone.

Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject.
(recounting what he told a player read more

Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject.
(recounting what he told a player who received four F's and one D)