Marriage is a wonderful invention; but, then again, so is a
bicycle repair kit.

Marriage is a wonderful invention; but, then again, so is a
bicycle repair kit.

It takes two to make a marriage a success and only one to make it a failure.

It takes two to make a marriage a success and only one to make it a failure.

Why get married and make one man miserable when I can stay single and make thousands miserable?

Why get married and make one man miserable when I can stay single and make thousands miserable?

Don't marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can't live without.

Don't marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can't live without.

The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties.

The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties.

A man marries to have a home, but also because he doesn't want to be bothered with sex and all read more

A man marries to have a home, but also because he doesn't want to be bothered with sex and all that sort of thing.

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

I've been married to one Marxist and one Fascist, and neither one would take the garbage out.

I've been married to one Marxist and one Fascist, and neither one would take the garbage out.

It destroys one's nerves to be amiable every day to the same human being.

It destroys one's nerves to be amiable every day to the same human being.