An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy.

An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy.

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as read more

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.

What a dreadful thing it must be to have a dull father.

What a dreadful thing it must be to have a dull father.

A woman's guess is much more accurate than a man's certainty.

A woman's guess is much more accurate than a man's certainty.

The trouble with some women is they get all excited about nothing, and then they marry him.

The trouble with some women is they get all excited about nothing, and then they marry him.

Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. read more

Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around her neck 'Lay on Top of Me Or I'll Die.' I didn't know what I was gonna do....".

When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her.

When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her.

Men are not the enemy, but the fellow victims. The real enemy is women's denigration of themselves. -Betty Friedan.

Men are not the enemy, but the fellow victims. The real enemy is women's denigration of themselves. -Betty Friedan.

The first woman was created from the rib of a man. She was not made from his head to top read more

The first woman was created from the rib of a man. She was not made from his head to top him, nor from his feet to be trampled on by him, but out of his side to be equal to him.