Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.

Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.

Worthless people live only to eat and drink; people of worth eat and drink only to live.

Worthless people live only to eat and drink; people of worth eat and drink only to live.

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

What harm in drinking can there be,
Since punch and life so well agree?

What harm in drinking can there be,
Since punch and life so well agree?

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're read more

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

Call things by their right names - Glass of brandy and water! That is the current, but not the appropriate read more

Call things by their right names - Glass of brandy and water! That is the current, but not the appropriate name; ask for a glass of liquid fire and distilled damnation.

There's some are fou o' love divine,
There's some are fou' o' brandy.

There's some are fou o' love divine,
There's some are fou' o' brandy.

You can't drown yourself in drink. I've tried, you float.

You can't drown yourself in drink. I've tried, you float.

Of course one should not drink much, but often.

Of course one should not drink much, but often.