Mynheer Vandunck, though he never was drunk,
Sipped brandy and water gayly.

Mynheer Vandunck, though he never was drunk,
Sipped brandy and water gayly.

Drinking will make a man quaff,
Quaffing will make a man sing,
Singing will make a man read more

Drinking will make a man quaff,
Quaffing will make a man sing,
Singing will make a man laugh,
And laughing long life doth bring,
Says old Simon the King.
- Unattributed Author, Old Sir Simon the King,

It's easy to quit smoking. I've done it hundreds of times.

It's easy to quit smoking. I've done it hundreds of times.

Or merry swains, who quaff the nut-brown ale,
And sing enamour'd of the nut-brown maid.

Or merry swains, who quaff the nut-brown ale,
And sing enamour'd of the nut-brown maid.

Alcohol removes inhibitions - like that scared little mouse who got drunk and shook his whiskers and shouted: "Now bring read more

Alcohol removes inhibitions - like that scared little mouse who got drunk and shook his whiskers and shouted: "Now bring on that damn cat!"

Call things by their right names - Glass of brandy and water! That is the current, but not the appropriate read more

Call things by their right names - Glass of brandy and water! That is the current, but not the appropriate name; ask for a glass of liquid fire and distilled damnation.

Drinking beer doesn't make you fat, It makes you lean....Against bars, tables, chairs, and poles.

Drinking beer doesn't make you fat, It makes you lean....Against bars, tables, chairs, and poles.

Nothing in Nature's sober found,
But an eternal Health goes round.
Fill up the Bowl then, fill read more

Nothing in Nature's sober found,
But an eternal Health goes round.
Fill up the Bowl then, fill it high--
Fill all the Glasses there; for why
Should every Creature Drink but I?
Why, Man of Morals, tell me why?

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.