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At first I thought, if I were Superman, a perfect secret identity would be "Clark Kent, Dentist," because you could read more
At first I thought, if I were Superman, a perfect secret identity would be "Clark Kent, Dentist," because you could save money on tooth X-rays. But then I thought, if a patient said, "How's my back tooth?" and you just looked at it with your X-ray vision and said, "Oh it's okay," then the patient would probably say, "Aren't you going to take an X-ray, stupid?" and you'd say, "Aw fuck you, get outta here," and then he probably wouldn't even pay his bill.
Laurie got offended that I used the word "puke." But to me, that's what her dinner tasted like.
Laurie got offended that I used the word "puke." But to me, that's what her dinner tasted like.
When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press read more
When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.
Strength is Happiness. Strength is itself victory. In weakness and cowardice there is no happiness. When you wage a struggle, read more
Strength is Happiness. Strength is itself victory. In weakness and cowardice there is no happiness. When you wage a struggle, you might win or you might lose. But regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being.
It is the coward who fawns upon those above him. It is the coward who is insolent whenever he dares read more
It is the coward who fawns upon those above him. It is the coward who is insolent whenever he dares be so.
When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It read more
When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if it's not, mmmmmmm, boy.
Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.
Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.
There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is cowardice.
There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is cowardice.
If men cease to believe that they will one day become gods then they will surely become worms.
If men cease to believe that they will one day become gods then they will surely become worms.
