Mark Twain

When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old read more

When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.

Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not read more

Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.

We do no benevolences whose first benefit is not for ourselves

We do no benevolences whose first benefit is not for ourselves

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living; the world owes you nothing; it was here first

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living; the world owes you nothing; it was here first

In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and read more

In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.